Mel's Story

A mother, A daughter, A sister, A wife, and A grandma

My mother has been blessed with a lot of things in her life. And, some NOT so great things as well. She was first married to a man, my father, that was simply a douche in other words he was a man that couldn't provide for his family nor was he the love of my moms life. But, lets not go there because the only blessing that came out of that man/marriage was ME.

When my mom graduated high school she entered into the military. Did her duty and served her time. She had me. My father was as quick in my life as out. I'm disgusted of the man because aside from all the stories my mom instilled in my head, I was a stubborn teen, I wanted to meet my father for myself and found out his true colors was exactly as my mom explained.

I, personally, don't have  relationship with my father, and that's that. I'm saddened by that but this is the real reason why. When I was a young little one, I'd say maybe like 4 or 5 years old maybe a little older or younger give or take a year, my experience was just - (blank stare).

My father wasn't too fond of HALF the things my mom would do for him, for her, for us. He would always pick a fight with her. And an argument would lead to a total beat down. Yes, my father was very well abusive. My mom stood on her tippy toes around the guy and living in abuse you know why. My mom always told me she was afraid that he'd leave and take me with him. Or, he'd beat her to death. Now, I can't speak from experience, but I know of a lot of women who stay in a relationship because 1) they don't know how to get away from the abuser and 2) their scared that he'll kill her before she left.

He did take me away, flew me to Oahu, and basically stole me! My mom cried cried cried until my Aunty (her sister) told her to go get me. I'm HER baby! She did. It wasn't too far after that they got a divorce and I was adopted by my grandparents. My father brought on a lot of stress that put my mom into really bad hypertension which eventually turned out that she had renal failure (kidney failure). After a year and half of dialysis, my mom was blessed. She got a kidney transplant!!!

She lived a happy 13 years with that kidney. Thank you, donor and Jesus for giving my mom extra time with her family.

She was able to work, watch me grow up, meet a wonderful man, raise a wonderful dog, and a beautiful daughter.

Before my mom got her transplant, guess what? My father up and left her - high & dry!! And, while down and out she met a guy, Marik, that was down for caring for her. I keep trying to remind my mom that she's better be thanking God for that special blessing because he stuck around when the rest of the world walked out. Well, nobody but my dad walked out (a-hole!)

So, after the 13 years of that wonderful organ, it's 2005. I just got diagnosed with diabetes and my mom ends up in the hospital shorty after and we find out that she's got renal failure again and needs to be put on dialysis. My mom will be on dialysis for 7 years come this February.

In 2009, my mom & stepdad's dog passes away. And, someones theory thinks that once their dog passed away that was where everything fell apart. They think Kaumakani, their dog (a rottweiler), had passed away from kidney failure as well. He was ill, but in my eyes, it was old age!

So, I went home this winter (2011), and my stepdad goes to Washington for a quick trip with his buddies. For awhile now, I've been watching my mom kind of deteriorate health wise and she's just down hilling. It first started with her weight loss, then her breathing, then everything in between started to unravel. She's constantly sleeping and then she's pretty much completely LOST herself. That's the one thing, especially, a daughter don't want to see.

So, give or take within the year of mid 2010 to mid Sept 2011, it was getting harder and harder for my mom to catch a breath. She was getting worse towards summer time of 2011and I kept reminding her "your breath is you're lifeline please check on that". She'd always push it aside. And, I know from experience, I'm as stubborned as her when it comes to seeing a doctor because you know there is always a bad diagnosis. If it hurts, or if something in your life is a bit difficult health wise and doesn't feel normal you KNOW it's bad. Anyways, eventually it started to get worse.

In September - November, she was finally diagnosed & treated with a new condition called Pulmonary Hypertension. The story is forever is because now that i'm older and able to actually have FEELINGS... I lived thru seeing my mom at her worse. Like this.

» Pulmonary Hypertension Story (open)